I Love and Understand You and Would Be Perfect to You Now

The "novel-in-stories" is done. I LOVE AND UNDERSTAND YOU AND WOULD BE PERFECT TO YOU NOW is done. Done as of 4pm today and sent off.

Some statistics (format "inspired" by a recent post by Tao Lin):

Total pages: 148 (12-pt Garamond, double-spaced, landscape, two columns)
Total stories: 29
Words: 36,671
Sentences/Paragraph: 3.1
Words/Sentence: 12.4
Characters/Word: 4.1
Passive Sentences: 2%
Flesch Reading Ease Level: 80.7
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 5.0
Longest Story (in pages): 15 ("Masturbation at Work")
Shortest Story (in pages): 1 (multiple)
Longest Story (in words): 4,627 ("Masturbation At Work")
Shortest Story (in words): 114 ("Ride Horse Look at Flowers")
Longest Story Title: 21 words ("Edith Piaf is Playing in a Dorm Room in a Upstate South Carolina, Whispering Secrets in a Language I Can't Understand")
Shortest Story Title: 1 word ("Arrival")
Representative Sentence #1: click here
Representative Sentences #2 and #3: "I was so sure it was something new, or else something I hadn’t felt in a while, but it was hard to tell with somethings, particularly the kinds of somethings I was so sure about. I was frequently wrong."

Flesch-Kincaid Readability Tests explained here.

Some statistics for other pieces of writing:

OTHELLO (Act I) by William Shakespeare

Passive Sentences: 3%
Flesch Reading Ease Level: 80.3
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 4.2

THE RETURN OF THE NATIVE [part 1] by Thomas Hardy

Passive Sentences: 10%
Flesch Reading Ease Level: 65.5
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 8.4

GREAT EXPECTATIONS [part 1] by Charles Dickens

Passive Sentences: 7%
Flesch Reading Ease Level: 74.7
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 7.7

"Espirit de l'Elevator" by Gary Lutz

Passive Sentences: 8%
Flesch Reading Ease Level: 74.4
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 6.3

SHOPLIFTING FROM AMERIAN APPAREL by Tao Lin

Passive sentences: 1%
Flesch reading ease: 86.2
Flesch-Kincaid grade level: 3.5